Forty years ago when my eldest son was born, it was (in the hospital where my wife was) unusual for fathers to be in the room at the birth. I and my wife asked for me to be present and the medical team agreed on the condition that, although I would be welcome, if I felt unwell at anytime, I should leave the room. If I fainted or vomited outside the room I could return, but if I did so inside I would be permanently banned.

That was agreed, I stayed, and it was a wonderful sharing experience for both my wife and I.

As my wife was getting to the climax of the birth and the midwife was saying, “Push! Push!” I found that I was pushing in unison with my wife. Eventually I had to go to relieve myself (!) and on the way out of the room I noticed some of the medical team making eye-contact and smiling at each other. Clearly another husband who couldn’t cope with witnessing the delivery!

The medical team were all surprised when I returned a few minutes later.

“Are you OK?”

“Yes, but I was pushing in unison with my wife and had to go and relieve myself.”

All the medical staff burst out laughing and I was told that NOT pushing in unison with the mother was the very first lesson you had to learn about attending a birth.