Movies leave out the most common part of the whole process: the utter tedium.

A typical cross-examination might go like this:

Attorney: Please take a look at Exhibit 37, page 10.

Witness: Okay, I have it.

Opposing Counsel: Hold on, my copy doesn’t have a page 10.

Judge: Mine has a page 10, but now that I’m looking, I don’t have page 8.

[Long recess to redo exhibit.]

Attorney: Now calling your attention to page 10. Do you see where the order form says that 10,000 widgets will be delivered?

Witness: No, actually, there’s a smudge because that page is folded. It really reads 120,000 widgets.

Opposing attorney: Let’s see the original document.

Attorney: I know I have it here somewhere ….

Judge: For some reason, my copy appears to have an extra page in it. I think it’s from Exhibit 36. Can we check?

Clerk: Actually, we have a problem; there are two items now marked Exhibit 37.

Judge: Whoops. Okay, let’s mark one of them Exhibit 37A and the other 37B.

Opposing counsel: Which one is which?

[Long recess.]

Counsel: Very well. Now, look at Exhibit 37A, page 10. Do we all have the same item now? Did you ship 120,000 widgets as called for by the order?

Witness: Yes, we did.

Counsel: You did? That’s not what you said in your deposition, page 256: “Question: did you ship 120,000 Grade AA widgets? Answer: No.”

Witness: Ah, but that was a different question. We did ship 120,000 Grade A widgets.

Counsel: But the order calls for Grade AA widgets.

Witness: It does? Not on my copy. I think your copy must have a shading problem; were you low on toner?

Opposing counsel: My copy of Exhibit 37A seems to have been mislabeled as Exhibit 37B.

Judge: Let’s have the court reporter read back the last portion of testimony and be sure that the reference to the Exhibit is correct.

[Record read.]

Judge: We’ll need to adjourn for the day. Counsel, please be prepared to discuss tomorrow whether we’ve been talking about Exhibit 37A or 37B, whether the order calls for 10,000 or 120,000 widgets, whether the prior testimony of the witness was about grade A or grade AA widgets, and whether we should sever this issue from the other issues in the case.

Counsel and opposing counsel, in unison: Can we step out into the hall and just try to settle the case?