My mom was at the hospital being treated for an infection. I called to check in on her, see how she was doing. The conversation went like this:

Me: Hi Mom, how are you feeling?

Mom: Terrible. I hate this hospital.

Me: Why, what's wrong with that hospital?

Mom: Its the staff. They are low-lifes! Druggies! Seriously!

[Pause]

Mom: You should get a job here.

Me: Thanks Ma.

True story. This just happened a few days ago.