Update：
My boyfriend corrected some of the statements.
I have been dating a Korean guy for 3 months now and it has been a very romantic experience. Contrary to what other people think about Korean guys being very bossy, they are great to their girlfriends (or before getting married as what my boyfriend told me). Just like dating anyone from a different culture, life could be difficult at times as we both speak different languages and are making our effort to communicate in English. However, the sweetness kicks in when we find out that we could understand each other with rudimentary languages, and it is then that we realized the language tricks fade away and only the true heart shows.
I could only share my personal experience of being a foreigner dating a Korean man, and that makes the guy we are talking about more open-minded than normal Korean guys. Also, I would also say that my boyfriend is quite different from other Korean guys, but I will try to generalize from what I heard from my friends as well.
There are a couple of great things about dating Korean guy like my boyfriend:
- Caring
I believe the level of care that Korean guys give to their girlfriends is enormous. It could be safe to say that you will never need to carry your bag if you are a girl. Also, different from other North Eastern Asian guys, Korean guys would be conscious to make their girlfriends walk in the inside of the road to protect them. Other examples include taking off their shirts (I mean they do have t-shirts on them still) and make their girlfriends comfortable with sitting on the public stool and providing shades for their girlfriends when she did not have a hat. The list goes on and on; I believe this partially comes from the detail-oriented nature of the people and also, the Korean drama might have a role to play.
2. Paying for the bill wherever we go in Korea
Yes, the money issue. To be honest, I am not fussy about who pays, but the Asian culture has it that to see whether a guy likes you, you need to see how much he is willing to sacrifice. There is certain truth in it, and when it comes to everything in Korea, he is always the person who pays everything. My boyfriend said this might not be true for normal Korean guys where Korean guys would usually pay for the bulk of the dinner whereas the girl will pay for something light. Overall, I think this is a characteristic to consider when dating Korean guys is he would normally take charge(pun intended) of the things we do.
3. Being out and about with our relationship
I personally have seen many couples wear couple things on the street and it is true with me and my boyfriend as well. In Korea, there is a sense to demonstrate the relationship between the couple once after they are together, and the couple clothes, couple rings, and couple shoes would be the best to show. Especially during the anniversary( 100 day, 1000 days etc) , the sense of celebration is omnipresent as the guy plans great events for the girl. In that aspect, dating a Korean guy could mean that it is hard to hide the relationship.. (which is a good thing)
However, just to stay objective, I also recognize that there are some not-so-pleasant things about dating a Korean guy.
- Being on your own during the weekdays and partially the weekends, too
The working culture in Korea is by far the most abhor-able one I have ever seen. They guys normally work till quite late everyday. He might not have the sense to talk to you after work (though my boyfriend is making great efforts to call me sometimes) Given the amount of gathering they need to attend after work, sometimes, it is completely normal to see them drunken in the wee hours. So it is increasingly hard to find time to date in Korea and that’s one thing every Korean guy’s girlfriend would have to bear. The best thing is if both parties are busy at the same time, then one person would actually find support from the other by accompanying each other through the long night on Kakao, and trust me, this support is enormous.
2. Having to take care of the Korean guy after marriage and be good at Korean food
Truth be told, Korean guys are like little children no matter how old they become. My boyfriend would need me to take care of the house chaos after we get married and the same goes with most Korean guys in the nation. Different from China, where guys do house work as well, the Korean culture, especially in the version with the older generation, the wife will need to take up the housework and take care of the husband well. Sometimes, the mother-in-law would require the wife to work hard at home or make great foods for the husband so that she is comfortable with leaving his son to the girl’s care. And my boyfriend also told me that guys will not be as caring after they get married, which I stared at him with absolute disbelief.
3. Have to understand him deeply as Korean guys are not good at expressing themselves
Last thing is that Korean guys are not good at expressing their feelings. Maybe this is the same with most Northeast Asian culture, the guy is wake if he shows his feelings too much , very much so in Korea. In that way, I think it takes effort for the girlfriend to understand them and know when not to disturb them when they are down and when really to disturb them when they need you. My boyfriend for one is not good with expressing his romantic side when we are together and especially when he was asked upon it, he would not even produce reasonable piece of romantic action despite much effort. I think it needs time slowly, and in that aspect, I believe girls would need to take the lead in building up the channel of conversation and making great breakthroughs in building a solid relationship.
Lastly, dating a Korean guy could be hard and sweet at the same time. In fact, it does not matter where he comes from in the end, because love says it all.