Coping with the FOMO (Fear of Missing out).

I have lived most of my life in Pakistan with my family, and while I do not miss Pakistan so much as a place to live, I certainly miss my family, a lot. And I fear to not be present in the important, small and big life events and achievements of my siblings, my parents, my friends. I fear to not be part of their little stories related to those achievements.

You see when you live or travel abroad, the biggest thing you lose even in the presence of tools such as Skype or video calls is the “the context of things”.

On Skype, the max you hear about is that “Oh your sister won the debating competition”, “your little brother was really excited to be in the plane for the first time”.

But you miss on “how it happened”.. “what were the reactions”.. “did a lot of people clap when she said that particular line?”.. “what else did he say?”.. “how did people react?” .. “what else?” Because there are so many details, and so little time to Skype that the most you can do is tell them how you feel about it.

And so, spending my time abroad, I fear my little siblings growing and not having a memory of me sitting beside them and being part of their life and, important life decisions…

You know when you travel back home, you wish and think that things and people will be the same as you left them - they are not.

Things change, people grow old and.. there are a lot of things you need to catch up. A lot. No matter how much you Skype.

And, this is what you sacrifice by going after your dream job, dream university, dream life.

People think life abroad is great and that you are enjoying it. Sure you are, but at the cost of getting stuck in this 'loop of missing out on a lot and catching up in a little'. Someone said, “when you travel, you miss out on too many things from your home to call it one, and you haven't spent enough to call your new country your home.” And I realize it now. It's exactly like that.