I went on a blind date, as a young man, with a girl my best friend set me up with. She was physically attractive but seemed very quiet and reserved.
Anyway, I had planned a lovely evening of going to the movies, then eating out at one of the nicer restaurants in my hometown. I had determined to show her a good time, though we didn't even know each other.
On the way to the movies, we began to warm up to each other with small talk and continued to laugh and get to know each other before the show began. I actually thought there was some real chemistry between us, and things were going great.
At some point during the show, she placed her hand on the armrest between us, and nervously, I moved mine to gently hold hers, trying to take things slowly. She snatched her hand away, as if I had burned it, jumped out of her seat, and yelled at me in front of the entire theatre. “I just wanted you to know I like you so far and am enjoying this date. But I know what you guys are like, and you need to know you aren't getting anything from me tonight!”
I was so embarrassed, I honestly didn't know what to do, so I sat there until the show ended and it was time to go.
When we got back to the car, she started talking about how good the movie was as if nothing had happened, and how she was really looking forward to the restaurant because she heard they were good. I was shocked because I figured I would just drive her home and never see her again after the psycho routine in the theatre.
Instead, I got one of my wicked ideas.
I drove us to the restaurant, got us a table, then I ordered a steak dinner right in front of her. When the waitress asked what she wanted, I quickly said all she wanted was a glass of water.
The girl glared at me, like you wouldn't believe, when the waitress left us. So I shouted out loudly, “I know what you women are like, and I just wanted you to know you aren't getting anything from me tonight!”
She got up, stormed out and called her father to come to get her.
That was the best-damned steak I have ever eaten.