Hi, Katja. Um… I’m a guy, and you ask ‘me’ what my biggest challenge as a woman is? You want my answer? Like… The ‘Honest’ answer? Say ‘Yes’. Ok -

Women. Other women are women’s biggest challenge. Women insist on competing against each other. And worse? Most women AVOID competing against men.

This is Universal. It’s at work - at lunch - at shopping - It’s everywhere. And it’s very aggravating, and irritating, and self defeating. Oop! Pardonne moi. Women compete the most in mixed environs. The competition is less hostile in all-girl situations - but that does NOT mean that the competition ceases to exist - It’s just lower keyed.

I’m not kidding, and I’m not wrong. I saw you fools in grade school - in elementary school - in high school - and in college. Then I saw you guys continue as employees in fast-foods, retails, in the gamut of office buildings, and in all manner of companies. You guys just HAVE to compete against each other. It’s sad.

BTW - It’s only possible because there’s too much free time at work. You get to ‘play’. Seriously. The lower the pay, the lower the stress. The lower the stress, the higher the female competition. Well-paid women all claim to be ‘above all that crap’. Bull.

And lest you think this is genderist? No. ‘I’ do not need makeup and pretty undies to venture outdoors. I’m a guy. However - I have seriously TRIED to convince women friends that they did not need to ‘play the game’… They could not STOP. Impossible.

I think separating out the issues of feminism from being a parent.

If women want true equity them they have to allow men the same parental rights and responsibilities they have. Men need to step up and take equal responsibility for children and women need to support them in making this change and balancing it with their career. Effectively other than the year around pregnancy, parental right should be equal, and issues like workplace discrimination based on this should be fought for both men and women.

This would then also separate out issues such as gender discrimination, which may have nothing to do with children. Women's work groups should counter discrimination based on gender. If they take on parental issues then they are perpetuating the myth that women should have children. Many women in the workplace don't have children and increasingly many choose not to.

Treating being a working women and a working parent as the same thing, creates expectations that 'having it all' is the only model for women. It discourages men from taking up their parental responsibilities, and masks lack of progress on gender issues with progress on childcare issues, which benefits men as much as women.

It should be a legitimate choice not to have children for men or women. Balancing work and being a parent needs to be supported for all. Gender discrimination needs to be battled as the separate issue it is, otherwise it's perpetuating that myth that a woman is a failure unless she is both the main bread winner and child raiser. Doing it all alone isn't good for anyone.

I suppose that the biggest challenge I have ever faced was learning to appreciate myself and be happy with who I am.

The thing is, that if you are into the “productive lifestyle” you probably constantly focusing on the next big step or that goal you have. But by constantly pursuing the next big thing and not taking a moment on reflecting and being proud for a moment for who you became, you end up on this highway of failures and difficulties without really taking a moment and telling yourself how much you love yourself. Which is very important in life I believe.

After taking a few moments for some “self-love” I developed a positive relationship with myself and it's making me live better with myself.

here is some shit i’ve had to deal with being female in the workplace

• being treated as if i’m stupid or incompetent
• expected to be in a great mood all the time as opposed to male colleagues who arent expected to
• being sexually harassed
• the glass ceiling stopping me from progressing
• not getting jobs because i didnt look good enough
• not getting perks because i didnt look good enough
• favouritism
• watching other female colleagues degrade themselves for money
• work cliques
• bullying
• unfair wages where male colleagues get paid more for same work
• not being listened to, being undermined, dismissed, ignored, skipped over
• being held to higher standard than male colleagues
• being mocked

Mine? Finding my heirs.

It took a LOT to get here. Now I would like all the effort not to be for nothing. I'm searching for the right Heathens to bequeath this land:

Thus far, not finding them. I'll live forever if I have to. I will not see my devotion squandered by idiots.

Dealing with my fathers death. He was dying for years from lung deterioration and eventual failure, and constant pain from various forms arthritis effecting good portions of his body. We could not clean the house, the chemicals made it hard for him to breath. He could not go anywhere. What made it more painful in the end was his stubbornness to not be a cripple. He fought at every turn even when he would sit down just praying to god to end the pain. He also loved driving, but cataracts took that away too. He would drive in his old pickup blind. He got into more bumper accidents so I had to drive around everywhere with him since I was eight then on. I told him where to turn, stop, red light, green light, etc. The only thing he ever managed to teach me as a young man before hell set in was my love of shooting. Not hunting, but the ability to hit my target at range. He got me a pellet rifle at the age of six, taught me to be safe with it, we set up a range in our backyard. He was a good man, and meant well. He died just last year, the man who practically raised me by himself.

He was master tool and dye maker of very high skill, and had a former eidetic memory until Alzheimer began setting in. Life was unfair to him, but he still believed in his god that he had studied for years, and years….

Being a girl myself, I feel I’m qualified to answer this question.

Let’s start in the beginning. When a girl is born, in the first few years they life is pretty much eat, poop, sleep. Similar to boy babies.

Now this girl, let’s call her Sarah, gets a little older. She’s starting preschool, kindergarten, she’s started to grow up. When little boys in her class act out, she sees her teachers brush it off as, “Oh, it’s just boys being boys.” But, if Sarah acts out, she’s displcined by her teachers and is forced to miss recess.

Little kids act out. We all know this. They’re kids, it’s what they do. Why is it more normal for little boys to do this than girls? They’re both kids. Little girls are often expected to behave and follow the rules, while it’s acceptable for their male counterparts to break all the rules they want and run around with their friends. Lots of little girls go through this, I know I did. Many people excuse this by saying “girls just mature faster than boys”. No, they’re forced to mature faster than boys.

Now Sarah gets a little older, she’s reached her teens and has begun noticing boys in a much different way. There’s this boy. Let’s call him Todd. Todd is constantly try to get after Sarah. He’ll walk with her to her classes, he’ll come up to her when she’s busy, he keeps trying to get her number, he’s often trying to touch or hug her, he simply won’t leave her alone.

Sarah doesn’t like this. She’s not interested in Todd and wants him to leave her alone. When she goes to her parents or adults at school, she keeps getting the same response, “Oh, he just likes you.”

No matter who Sarah tells, her discomfort is brushed away. It has now become socially acceptable and even romanticized in the media for a boy to constantly go after a girl after repeated rejections. This happens often to lots of girls and women. Many experience a time in their life when a man simply won’t accept that no means no. It’s not an invitation, it’s not a challenge. It’s just no. When a girl says no. It means no. Don’t keep going after her. Don’t keep pining for her. When’s she’s clearly made it clear she’s not interested, leave her alone. It’s not “playing hard to get”.

This concept is often romanticized in books and movies. Shy girl gets the hottest guy in school going after her, it’s a common cliche and happens again and again. The problem is that this has made it seem okay for guys to keep pining after girls even after they’ve expressed that their uncomfortable and not interested. I’ve seen this happen before, and it’s not okay.

Sarah is now an adult. She’s decided to persue a career in STEM and is studying hard for it. Many of her classes in high school and college were mostly male, as STEM is a male dominated field. Despite this, Sarah decides to persue her career anyways because this is what she wants to do.

Sarah notices for projects and presentations she’s often not choosen and is the person people groan when they realize their “stuck” with her. The guys in her group do everything and Sarah doesn’t get a chance to learn and practice her skills. Sarah is now at a disadvantage from the very beginning of her career.

Throughout her career, Sarah notices she’s often not picked for big projects, and her male coworkers are picked for promotions over her.

Now it’s true sometimes her male coworkers might simply be more qualified than her but in a male dominated field like STEM, women are often seen as less skilled or proficient than men.

One day at work, Sarah gets frustrated. She’s snaps at a coworker and complains about her frustrations.

One guy says, “Oh, she’s just PMSing.”

This is a common occurrence. Women, from their teens up, are often just brushed aside when they express their emotions with the excuse of “Oh, she’s just PMSing.” Women are people. They get upset, they get sad, they get frustrated. It’s not okay to cope up every emotion a woman has to PMS. This is a common struggle for many women. It’s not okay for them to be pushed aside just because once a month they have a period.

These among many others, are common struggles that women face.

Now let’s get more individual. I was born into a Muslim Pakistani family and my family was as desi as could be.

I was an early bloomer, I started puberty at age 8. From the moment I had breasts, I was told to cover them up with a scarf. This got more common as I grew older.

In sixth grade, when I was 12 years old I traveled to Pakistan for my uncles wedding.

There were many adult males around me, and all the time I was told to cover up my breasts.

Now, I was only 12 years old. Why was I told to cover myself up instead of the men who sexualize a 12 year old to stop? The men were the problem, not me.

My older uncle (not the one getting married) was often the one who told me to cover up. It was not his place to tell me to do anything. But I was forced to go with it anyways, and he was never told off.

When I was 9 1/2 years old. I got my period. For almost two years onaward, until I was 12, my mother forced me to hide my period. I wasn’t allowed to tell anyone, talk about it to anyone, I had to pretend it didn’t exist at all, even with the people in my own house. When Ramadan came around, I had to pretend to fast while on my period. One day my grandmother found out from the blood on my pants and my mother blamed me for my laziness. She yelled at me and made me feel guilty for something that was natural and in no way my fault. She made me pretend I wasn’t on my period even though my grandmother knew. She claimed my grandmother would tell her daughter, my aunt, and she would spread gossip around. She said I was too young to have my period and I wasn’t supposed to get it until I was 12.

Now I know this isn’t as much of a common diffilty faced by girls, but stigma around the female body and periods is common in many cultures. Many young girls don’t have anyone to talk to about it and they grow up not having knowledge about their own bodies.

I grew up hating myself for having my period and thinking something was wrong with me. I shouldn’t have had to grow through that and instead my mom should have taught me periods are a natural thing and it’s okay that I got mine earlier than most girls did.

Men and women both face struggles and difficulties throughout their lives. In this post, I’m not saying only women go through these difficulties or that all men are at fault. I’m just trying to best answer this question I can through my experiences.

If you got this far, thank you for listening.

I have been grappling with clinical depression of varying degree since I was seventeen, and I am 27 years old now. And the worst part of it is no one around me knew that it is a mental illness that can be cured.

I come from a really uneducated part of third-world where the best interpretation for mental illness was that I was possessed by demons. First they tried to get the "demons" out by performing various rituals. After failing to succeed, I was marked "crazy" and "too lazy for self-improvement" and accused of creating a scene to harm the reputation of my family. Therefore, I was shunned by my family, loved ones and the society. The depression worsened and deepened to the point that I attempted suicide by cutting my wrist when I was 21. Well, I survived and I did not like the fact that I survived. I got mad at myself for not being "normal" as everyone else. I was halfway there to insanity.

I can tell you that I have not faced any challenge like that in my life. I was broke, sleeping on streets, eating out of garbage cans and had no one to help me emotionally and had a major depression which I did not know what to do about.

I don't want to end up on a negative note: Fast forward six years, I am in the United States, about to graduate college with a degree in Mathematics with complete intention of getting a PhD in the subject. I have done fairly well in the college (3.9 GPA, some nice enough awards etc.) and am anticipating to pursue graduate studies in a fairly well respected university. Even now, I have episodes of depressions every 2 to 3 months, which basically paralyzes me and renders me ineffective for days. All I do during these times is just accept the fact that it is a phase that I have to wait to pass by. During these episodes, my goal remains to not harm myself, do a little mathematics, workout and eat properly. I am still doing it alone with no resources (financial or emotional). No doubt that this has been a huge challenge as I try to better myself in every way possible.

Women and their own established outlooks and habits. Many women (I hope it's mostly older women and that younger women don't sabotage themselves in this manner) didn't learn how to effectively communicate and negotiate within the workplace, and they don't believe that they should question how things are done, or ask for changes in policies, pay, benefits or improvements in working conditions.

Sadly, questioning authority is generally frowned upon, and conformity is emphasized during both grammar and high school. Making reasonable requests in the workplace is something everyone should be able to do. My field was nursing, and the majority of nurses (over 91%), currently are women. While the number of nurses is very similar to the number of teachers, nurses have not chosen to band together or to unionize and effectively bargain for improvements as teachers have done.

Changing and improving workplace policies that are incompatible with workers needs, or advocating for your own best interests should be something people naturally do; not something they avoid or are afraid to do. Most adult men are capable of asking for a raise, or for time off, but too many women I've worked with simply don't or won't ever do this.

Working in a nursing home, while passing meds, every washroom I entered attempting to wash my hands had NO SOAP AND NO PAPER TOWELS. NONE. It's impossible to safely care for patients without being able to wash your hands. There were five other nurses working on the floor with me, and NONE of them was willing to complain. I went directly to the Administrator and told him that every dispenser needed to be filled immediately. He went to the head of houskeeping, who had decided for some unknown (but certainly ridiculous) reason, to refill all of the soap and towel dispensers only on a certain day of the week, rather than when needed. Problem resolved. Things don't change without some type of action. Nobody is going to make sure you're treated fairly unless you point out that you're NOT being treated appropriately and demand proper treatment and compensation for what you do.

All employers are in business to make money. They will pay the least amount possible to earn the largest profits. They will overwork people, and unfairly compensate them, whenever they have the opportunity to do so.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/health.usnews.com/wellness/articles/2017-03-29/immigrant-nurses-filling-the-next-us-shortage%3fcontext=amp

Nursing wages and working conditions are negatively affected by the large percentage of foreign nurses imported under H-1B visas; currently about 15% of U.S. nurses are foreign born. These nurses are not “free agents” as native born nurses are- they must conform to the rules set up by their “sponsor” employers, or face deportation. I'm not criticizing foreign nurses, I've worked with many foreign nurses and they've been well trained and professional. However, the fact is that once here and working, their individual situation resembles slave labor more than free market employment. Thus, employers have (and take advantage of) the opportunity to suppress wages by asserting there are no nurses available to hire in the U.S., so we need H-1B visas to import nurses.

Where the revolving door is swiftest

Nursing has the highest rate of attrition of any profession. Nurses are mostly women. Nursing pay exceeds the pay of retail jobs, fast food jobs, and all nurses have invested time and money in obtaining their education and license. Yet, about 15% of nurses quit the profession they've invested in, trained for, and are proficient in, every single year.

It seems to me that many women actually work against their own best interests, at least in this particular field of work. The attrition rate among nurses has been 10–15% for at least 50 years. One would think that during five decades women nurses, and men nurses, collectively, had the power to initiate meaningful improvements in working conditions so more nurses would remain in the profession; yet they didn't and don't utilize their power effectively. Sigh.

Me and my maid face the same problems as working women.

That is like weighing apples and oranges you may say.

But here me out.

My maid says, she wakes up at 5 am everyday to make breakfast and lunch, wash clothes and then start her work at 8 am; going to many houses to do their dishes, sweep and mop the floor.

Every house has its own way of cleaning and this lady has to adhere to the policies. Once done, she goes back home for lunch and then again starts her work as a housekeeper.

She earns may be 10k per month; she doesn’t know to read and write properly. She is criticised for her lack of cooking skills by her mother in law. Her husband also criticises her if she misses preparing food at home. Evening after work she goes back home to do the dishes at her home. The same routine 24/7 irrespective of Saturdays and Sundays.

She has 2 kids, whom she have left in her hometown as it is very expensive to send them to schools in Bangalore; also to feed and care for them. She is criticised for that too. However being a strong lady, she is taking care of her family by working and being away from them, toiling day and night.

Coming to me; I am well learned, have a good job, earn well and also take care of my family. The burden of household chores and cooking is upon me. My family rely on me for nourishment, clean house and fresh clothes.

Even though I have a housekeeper to lower my burden, a washing machine to wash and dry clothes, I have to manage everything. From buying groceries to cooking, performing and excelling at my job to taking care of my own health.

I have set a routine and I adhere to it. Even though it seems monotonous it is hard work. No matter how many chores I delegate, yet all the routine is running in background in my mind. It takes sucks most of my energy and I feel relaxed at the end of week.

I am so involved in this routine, that I can’t grow, I can’t learn, I can’t let go. Sometimes I think - “I’ll not cook today. Let’s see what happens”. But it doesn’t pan out that way.

My mind works like a machine and even when it is not running, I have to grease it with sufficient moral and ethical encouragement to keep going.

If someone asks me what I have done in the past 6 months; I have no answer.

“Just the same usual, managing office and work at home”.

This is just the tip of the iceberg. When I do get judged for various reasons, I have to take measures to not let it affect me and my mind. It takes immense effort to keep your spirits buoyant all the time. It is a thankless job after all.

Oh that’s easy.

When I work, my first plan is to “define the problem.”
Then, when the application work happens, I disappear.
When all the evals are good, I re-appear so fast that I bruise my thighs on the front of the “Atta-Team” desk to show what a rewarding worker I am.

If I am bored, I snitch on my co-workers.

When facing stiff competition for promotion, I put in a sexual-harassment claim against the most threatening — this also goes for those employees that catch-on to my filthy mental state in making the work environment hostile.

To get my jollies off, I sail among the cubicles (or machinery) with my dorsal fin breaking the waterline looking for violations to rape someone of their paycheck.

Oh. I also do the very same shit I did in the Jr. High Girl’s Room.

.

I have been getting about 3 hours of sleep per night for the past week or so. I have been a little more irritable, but it is under control thus far because it would inappropriate and immature to unleash at the workplace or on my beautiful wife. I’ve been venting by writing on Quora and talking to my brother.

My wife is close to 8 weeks pregnant and she is extremely nauseous and cannot sleep at night. She is only able to fall asleep after I give her a shoulder massage when we’re sitting on the couch and she falls asleep on my chest. If I move, she will wake up and be unable to sleep for the rest of the night. Around 1 or 2 AM we migrate to the bed and I can sleep. She is considerate and insisted that we go back to the regular sleeping arrangement because I’m not getting much sleep. I have vetoed that idea. She’s the pregnant one, not me. Jackie needs to rest so I will take the L until her nausea lessens. According to my mom and hers, the nausea typically goes away after the first trimester.

Tomorrow is our post-wedding celebration party so I’m not going to get any goddamn sleep until Saturday. Oh well, perhaps I can catch a nap sometime tomorrow.

My intent is not to complain, but vent.

Losing my best friend.

He was a friend, an older brother, a mentor and the most reliable person in my life.

Many people who have lost a close loved one can personally relate to this.

Of course, the grief is tough. You hold on to the memories with the knowledge there will be no more.

I lost a few loved ones in my life, but this one was particularly challenging, because I was so reliant on him.

It was like the ground fell from under me. Like every step I took was full of insecurity.

Looking back, it’s certainly one of the most challenging times of my life. Even if I miss my friend every day, I am grateful for him, and for what this tragedy has taught me.

It taught me to rely on myself and my gut first.

It taught me that I must be ready to lose all I have at any time.

And most importantly -

It taught me that love is a force that goes beyond the body and the mind, geographical location, expectation.

True love is unconditional and there’s real beauty in this.

I still feel him every day, but instead of sadness, I feel love. Love and Gratitude.

Thank you.

That “empowerment” is just what other people tell us what to do and what to be. They tell us that we are weak, so at that point we know how wrong they are. And even if “empowerment” would be any miracle, we would never be actually empowered, just wearing a mask to look like something we are not.

If someone is looking for “empowerment”, that means he/she has been through a tough time. We simply got to get over it, learn with it, be ready for future challenges based on our experience. Being “empowered” is just an illusion, that soon or later will come off and we won´t be ready. We will feel weak when it happens.

Just be yourself, and learn with experiences, be it in personal or profesional life, you got to be you, and is not worth to try to be someone else. You can become someone stronger, but won´t be any “influencer” who will teach you that. They will just teach you to value yourself and care less about others, which could ruin your life in many aspects.

Just remove that stupid word “empowerment” from you dictionary!! You don´t need it. You are way stronger than that!!!

In some ways, no different than the working man: bosses that demand too much and pay as little as they can get away with. In other ways, it depends on the job and her family situation. I work in a male dominated field. I have to work twice as hard to get the same recognition as male coworkers. I get asked to do menial tasks like taking notes in meetings way more than more junior male colleagues. In my first marriage, I bore the responsibility for nearly all of the childcare and household chores. I’d have had more freedom as a single mother. Having said all that, my choice of careers, to work, and to have a child are not regrets at all. I love my son, I’ve enjoyed my career.

Possibly one of the biggest challenges in our lives is this...

To achieve success we MUST work on our priorities and eliminate distractions. The challenge is that very frequently we don’t even realize we’re distracted!

To answer your question, what’s the biggest challenge you are currently facing?

I’ve been struggling terribly with this lately, so now I’m getting rid of my smartphone while working.

What ONE distraction do you need to eliminate?

#BeBusinessSmart

I tried them all. Women need to step out of game completely and do things differently to get noticed. Sometimes it's just best to switch careers entirely.

If you really wanted a particular job but your resume was treated like it didn't matter, turn into a petty, unrelenting, and vocal woman and point out why they shouldn't have ignored your resume. If someone is going to ignore your qualified resume, prove to them by showing them why they shouldn’t have done that.

It'll be your ego in charge but sometimes you've earned the ego through hard-work, passion and experience. Keep pointing out why they should have hired you until they are crying.

Then go work for that job’s competitors and help them succeed instead.

My today's challenge was to keep my shit together and not end up in a puddle of depression.

I recently lost the love and light of my life, my sweet sweet daddy to covid. He was so fit and full of life that it is extremely hard and impossible to believe he's no more.

I try not to think of this but I can't so i try at least not to look at his pictures. Because he looks so alive and healthy in all the pictures that it breaks me into a million pieces. My dad, the one who loved me unconditionally is no more and getting through each day with this thought is next to impossible.

Most of the times i want to go to him. Most of the times i almost give up, but there are people here who needs me. Thinking of my mom and husband keeps me alive and going because i cannot abandon them at any cost.

“… bias, judgement, exclusion, …” Be bold and very good at your job. Be and remain crème de la crème. Never give up. Stand out among mediocre coworkers. This will give you an edge over them. Their chances of bothering you will reduce.

Never allow “being taken advantage of”. Fight back tooth and nail. If and when you fear an assault, be prepared. Keep a weapon for protection, or pepper spray, or things like that, without anybody knowing about it. Also, take help of the system, the HR representatives. These days it is very difficult for goons, bullies, predators to victimize women employees. Most HR departments have special officials who help you, protect you, from such toxic louts. Find out who are these people in your HR. It is good to know them. If this does not work, report the inconvenient issues and awkward behavior to the local police. Keep a paper trail.

My biggest challenge ever was to become independent and stand on my own feet after my tumor surgery when I was 21 years old. It took me 10 years of working 14–16 hours literally every single day to reach the top of my career and that too in a male dominated country in 1990″s.

After achieving it, had to leave everything and go abroad to start all over again was another big challenge in life. After achieving success in Dubai in a decade, immigrating to Canada was the biggest challenge of all because I had to work harder taking my 2 children everywhere in —20 Deg. I don't how many such challenges are waiting for us in future but let me tell you that, life is interesting and adventurous.

I was fairly young as I made my way up corporate ladders at several Fortune Ten companies. I was also single and reasonably attractive.

This led to multiple opportunities for male attention. I could easily sort out those who were honestly interested from those who wanted to spend the night. However, most important to me was keeping my corporate reputation from any suspicion. I avoided interoffice relationships studiously. It was not always easy.

One special person convinced me to spend time with him. He was Executive Vice President and single, but I wanted to keep our relationship clandestine. We could have travelled extensively to corporate holdings, but I refused. We didn't socialize in his circle. It was too much of a strain and we broke up. When I was changing jobs there happened to be a corporate cocktail party to which we both were expected to attend.

I knew I was leaving, so I asked him to dance. Surprised, he accepted. I said "we are causing gossip" He said "If only they knew how old it is." We found a corner and he told me he had just accepted a new job, and asked me to marry him. I was shocked. I told him I would have to think about it. When I got home I cried. I knew it was just too late.