Once upon a time, my then-husband and I lived in an apartment building with thin walls.

My husband had really, really good hearing. One night, the downstairs neighbor turned on her radio full blast.

My husband had to go upstairs to our neighbor’s apartment to sleep. I can sleep through anything, so I slept in our place.

I woke at 5:30 am and still heard the stupid stereo blasting. I called the police non-emergency line.

They told me to call 911.

“It’s only a noise complaint,” I said. “Are you sure?”

“Call 911,” they said.

So I did. I barely had time to get dressed when the cops came to the front door. I let them in and fled to my apartment post-haste, shutting the door just in time to keep the obnoxious neighbor from seeing it was me who called the police on her.

The next day, I told my husband what I had done. He told me to call the landlord, tell them what happened, and say the magic words.

The magic words were, “I’d hate to see what this will do to your property values.”

Guess who got evicted soon after?

Guess who helped her move out?