I secretly threw away someone’s set of keys!

I was a server in a restaurant during lunch one day when these two ladies came in with four kids, all under the age of eight. I was not particularly busy during that shift, so I was very attentive to the ladies and children throughout their meal. However, the ladies were busy trying to chat with each other and ignored the children and were oblivious to the fact that their unsupervised children were misbehaving as unsupervised children often do. In fact, whenever I passed by the table to see if I needed to be of any service, the kids would notice me, ask for a bunch of random things, which I would either politely bring them if possible, or I would politely suggest they ask their mother for permission first if it was something like a milkshake which would be an additional charge.

The ladies would never even make eye contact with me after they placed their order, so I would quietly refill their drinks when needed while they kept yapping on at each other while their kids were just getting rowdier and rowdier. The restaurant was pretty empty as there was a big thunderstorm moving in, so it wasn't really a big deal about the kids until the moms (who never even gave me any attention when I was at their table) started sending the kids on field trips around the restaurant to find me whenever they “needed” something. Those of you who have ever been servers know that if you are already taking great care of a guest, but then the guest keeps sending kids around to find you in the kitchen or wherever to get extra napkins (hmmm… I just gave them a giant stack PLUS wet naps for all the kids) or some more bread (that’s interesting… the two baskets full on their table are still fresh), you are about to get a crappy tip from these people. They are obviously trying to make me feel like I haven't been taking care of them, and now that they’ve “had to send the kids to hunt her down” they will feel justified in stiffing me on the tip. So even though I know it’s coming… .

As the sky starts to look even more evil outside, the group finally leaves, and of course they leave a giant mess everywhere. Food is matted into the carpet under the table, mashed potatoes are smooshed into the upholstery, there are (ahem) three baskets full of untouched bread with another three baskets full of breadcrumbs all over the place, and I get to work immediately on cleaning up the mess. I'm using that old server motivation of "Maybe they left my tip somewhere underneath all this mess, so if I clean it up really fast I’m gonna find it!”

Well one thing I DID find was a full set of keys; house keys, car keys, gym key card, work keys, I don't know how many keys, but probably at least a dozen things were on that fob. I stuck them in my apron pocket intending to turn them in to my manager. But by the time I got this exorcism-level mess cleaned up, I was pretty steamed about how those ladies had treated me and honestly, how they had treated their kids. Then about 45 minutes after they had left, one of the kids comes into the restaurant, soaked by the roaring thunderstorm that is now in full force, and asks, “Did my mommy leave her keys here?” and I realized in that moment that this lady must have gotten a ride to lunch with the other one, and didn't realize about the keys until she had gotten all the way home in the thunderstorm, and then had probably emptied out her purse looking for them, then freaked out about where she had seen them last, and then realized she had left them at the restaurant! Then she needed to hitch a ride back to the restaurant in this godawful weather, and had sent her poor kid into the roaring rain to collect the keys from inside.

So back to, “Did my mommy leave her keys here?”. I walked the kid over to the now perfectly clean table and pretended to look for the keys as I truthfully answered, “Well, I sure don't see them!”

And as the kid quietly walked back outside into the storm, I silently walked back into the kitchen and dropped the keys into the most disgusting trash can I could find.