I can only speak for myself and my own life with my ex. I would say that anything I did he’d find ways to either compete with me or if he couldn't then he’d find ways to tear down anything that showed I did something well or something nice for someone else. One year for example I used enough coupons and found sales to make 30 xmas bags for several others whom might not have had any xmas otherwise.

Each person was given a bag full of personal items that normally would have cost quite a bit but ended up not doing so. He's remarks to me when I said how many I'd gotten together was hatefully telling me just how ridicules it was. However, when we went an delivered them I just smiled as he set there an watched their happy faces.

He had our son complain to me that his Dad said I always cook the same thing over an over. So I went to the Bookstore and brought a couple of cookbooks and started adding to the meals I knew how to cook. I would rotate out the meals each 30 days which means I only cooked the same meal once a month. I just smiled when his family came to visit an would not stop bragging about the meals I'd put in front of them.

When he'd get sick or as he had a few surgery's he was treated like a king. He’d sit in the chair while meals were brought to him everyday for a week or so.

I didn’t say much when the treatment I got when he was needing to step up to the plate and be there for me was no more than hateful answers in return.

I didn’t say much when he actually took me to a nice resort place in INDIANA and they actually thought I was the other women cause he'd been there so many times with his blankie , blank (Mary). I’d just smile when they figured out not only was I the wife, but as he told me while we were leaving they had asked him to never come back again. He declined to tell me why. But I knew why because of the off handed way they acted toward me until I gave them my card to pay for something which of course had his same last name. They had tried to run his card but it didn't work. It did but they hide that fact an used it as an excuse to get mine and look at my name.

When he walked out the door to follow his heart (totally different women this time) I smiled cause I knew what was coming.

The part that made it the best was he could not believe or understand why I did not once, come running after him, begging him to come back to me. Telling him I needed him or I missed him. He just could not get it though his head as he thought he was the King in his Castle because no matter what crap he'd try to pull on me I'd find away to raise above it. Yes I continued as always during our 33 years of marriage to take my responsibilities serious. I’d put food on the table, keep the house clean, work either a part time or full time job in the process. But still he could not understand why I wasn’t crying after him, begging him to come home. I mean I had took all his crap in spades so he continued to believe he was the King in the household an if while I had so many times continued doing what a wife would do while being treated so very badly then why wasn’t the tears falling down my face? Why wasn’t I calling him minute after minute for him to return to his thrown?

Why? Because even though I took care of what I was suppose to, even though he was never there for me, even when they thought I might have cancer, even though in that same time frame he told me in front of our 14 year old son that I was to move from our home were he could move into my place, at our home, his (blankie, blank Mary) while telling me he would give me 300 dollars a month to live on when at that time I had no income of my own, but still continued to take care of my responsibilities he could not understand why I could have cared less when he left, why I never called after him to come home. I never took anytime to call an connect to see how he was doing or if he needed me.

This is why when I’d go outside to mow the yard he’d have a neighbor call him and he’d fly over and stand on the porch starring at me (very creepy might I add) cause it was his way of saying “ here I am come running after me”. I would see his car pull in an out of the corner of my eyes an see him on the porch standing there waiting for me to come asking him to come back. I wouldn’t even make eye contact, I would just keep mowing! Nothing to see there.

Even the first day of court he’d walked all the way down the hallway an sit down were he'd be in my eyesight as if saying, aren’t you going to cry over me? While in court he’d answer a question like he wasn’t sure then in watching the tape you could see him looking at me to answer for him as he knew he gave the wrong answer an expected me to jump in. Didn't happen!

I don’t believe to date he has figured out why time after time I didn't reach out for him to come back, to come home an be there for me.

The truth is because the only one he was ever there for was himself. The only one being cared for was him. I didn’t need or want him because he had nothing in the relationship to give. No comfort, no concern, no emotional support, nothing! He was so used to being NO 1 and taking and taking thinking he was the King in his castle that he could not figure it out.

Why isn't she in pieces over me? I was treated like a king! The reason no one cared is because he was NO King in my eyes, he was nothing in my eyes, I was just fulfilling my responsibilities an that was all.

So when he left he didn’t take anything nor did he leave anything behind. The reason for that was he had given nothing, had offered nothing, so there wasn’t an oz of loss for me.

I suppose in what I'm saying is he will probably wonder for the rest of his miserable life why he didn’t get from me heartache over losing him, why no tears, not one, why did I continue doing what a wife would do no matter what?

Because I can say I did. He has nothing to say that's true, nothing to say he even measured up to being a decent man or a decent husband or father. But I can say I did what a wife was suppose to do.

So after all those years of thinking he's the King in my world maybe by now he’s realized his gone to far, stepped on to many others to many times. And his just not wanted. He has nothing to offer, he’s no one to cry over him.

And that's my revenge for him to realize if you want to be a King you’d better make sure the one backing you is your Queen an your best bet is to always make sure you treat her according.

Thank God an Greyhound I’m free!!!