This is more of an example of when I first realized that my family was more fortunate than some families, that some people had less income compared to my family, and that my family did not have a limited budget for food purchases. This slowly led to a better understanding of why our family had a LOT of things that my friends’ families didn't have, and why we were able to travel to so many places, including other countries.

When I was in the 5th grade, I had stayed the night at my friend Jana's house. The next morning, we had slept in until noon. When we woke up, her parents weren't home. This was the first time I had stayed at a friend's house where both parents worked outside of the home, so I wasn't used to waking up to an empty house. I was hungry. “What can we have to eat?” I asked. Jana piped up and asked me did I want a peanut butter sandwich, or did I want noodles. I wanted a sandwich, so I prepared one while she cooked noodles for herself.

After we ate our lunches, we were still hungry. Jana went to the pantry and brought down a package of cookies. She looked inside and said that there weren't very many, and if we ate them, there wouldn't be any left … that there was a new package as well (unopened), but that we couldn't open it. I asked Jana why not. She hopped down off the countertop that she had climbed up on in order to reach the cookies, and as she glided across the linoleum kitchen floor in her socks, she answered, “Because my mom doesn't get paid again until …” and when she had glided all the way to the calendar on the wall, she pointed to a date on the calendar that had been circled, and said, “… here. She doesn't get paid until this date. So, if we get into the new package of cookies, there may not be enough for everyone until she gets paid again.” Baffled, I said, “Okay, so we won't do that.”

My father owned a lucrative business, and my mother was not employed. I had no idea what it meant to “get paid,” much less, wait to open a package of food until a date circled on a calendar. Soon after, I remember asking my father when does he get paid. I don't remember exactly what he told me. I just remember coming away with the understanding that there were no decisions made about food lasting until a date circled on the calendar. I grasped it. I didn't feel good about it, I didn't feel bad about it, but it changed something in me. I guess it is an early memory of being “mindful,” in some sense.

From there on out, when I had friends over to my house, and we we stood in front of our “snack pantry” stocked full of a variety of foods, that if there was a box that had not yet been opened, I told them that it was okay to open it. I understood that it wasn't the same at everyone's house. I understood that if we finished off a package of cookies, chips, or whatever, at my house, there would be more within a few days. I also learned that my mom was not employed because my father's business income was such that she had the opportunity to choose whether or not she worked a paying job. I began to learn a lot of things. I learned that money came into our home from my father owning and working a business, and that no one in our home followed a calendar that determined when more food could be purchased. Most of all, I learned to be mindful of the fact that at some of my friends’ houses, that's just how it was. I understood why, and it was okay. It didn't mean anything else … like, no one was better than anyone else.

I remember one time when my friend was over to play, and her mom honked the horn to come out to the car because it was time for her to go home. We were about to have a snack. She was standing at the door, sad that she had to leave before we had our snack. I hollered at her and tossed the snack saying “Here! Take it with you. Take two!” and I threw another one! We were laughing! I stood at the front door and watched my friend run down the steps to the car, where her mother was waiting. I was a bit sad that our play time was over. As she got into the car, I saw her hand one of the two snacks to her little sister, who was sitting in the backseat. For some reason, I was ECSTATIC! My point isn't that my friend's family did or didn't have any snacks at home. For all I knew, they had more than we did. My point is, that the generosity that was already part of my character, had now extended to the concept of being generous with food items.

I'm not wealthy now, as an adult. As a matter of fact, I have dates circled on my household calendar reflecting when bills are due, etc. When my daughter was a child (she is now in her 20′s), I always tried to send her to school with two snacks: One for herself, and one for a child without one. My daughter is now grown, and a teacher at a grade school with a high poverty rate. One particular thing that she enjoys doing every Friday, is handing out large packs of food to the children that the local food bank delivers to the school. The food is sent home with the students so that they are not hungry over the weekend.

Although my daughter was never hungry growing up in our home, she remembers the pantry running low. She remembers when I returned home from a donation center with only a can of refried beans and a can of peaches. When she was 12 -15, we were one of those working class single parent families who was far enough over the poverty line (by $69.00), that we did not quality for food bank donations. She remembers being invited by her (more fortunate) friends to go eat sushi at their favorite spot after school. She remembers saying that she wasn't hungry when it was her turn to order, just sipping on water while her friends ate, too embarrassed to do anything else. My daughter did not share this with me until she was much older, and not until a time when “our pantry was full.” When I asked her why not, she told me it was because she didn't want me to feel sad that she was one of the kids without “a snack.” She has her own childhood stories of awakening to the fact that some families have more food than others, but from an entirely different perspective.

Looking back, I wish I could have opened a pantry for her, telling her to eat whatever she wanted, that if a box were unopened, to open it. Perhaps a pantry with some sushi! If only I could have rearranged time somehow and thrown snacks to her as she went out the door to be with her friends! However, you know, I know, Jana knows, my daughter knows, her students know - that it's not the same at everyone's house. Some families' pantries are full. Some are rationed according to a date circled on the calendar. Some pantries have food from a food donation center. Then there are some pantries unlike any of the others: pantries that are bare. My daughter and I also learned first hand lessons about those pantries, as well as lessons about families with no pantry at all (which at one time included our family). But those lessons are for other stories, as I have already extended way past the Question: When is the first time you realized you were wealthy? What a great Quora question.