A guy I had been seeing had beaten me. A new experience for me, and one I definitely did not intend to repeat. When I immediately dumped him he left messages threatening to beat me again if I didn't stop telling mutual friends about it. Didn't stop me, but it seriously raised the threat level from him.

We were both involved in the local ballroom dancing community. To reduce the immediate threat I switched to a dance studio he never attended. Two weeks later, he showed up at a class while I was there: to avoid him I begged them to let me leave through the office, something normally forbidden. When I explained why, they made it clear that he would not be welcome there again. Whew! A safe place! It would be safe later, anyway, but not that night.

I walked out into the cold night air, shaking almost as badly as the night I fled his home, half-naked and bruised. I wasn't as much afraid as really, really angry. Fuming. Furious. Enraged. I was trying to keep things low-key and relatively civilized, and he'd managed to intrude on one of my major passions and joys--dancing.

He had bought a brand new shit-brown Buick a few months earlier, and it was parked right next to my car in the parking lot the studio shared with the convenience store next door. Without even really thinking, I went into the store and bought a couple of big tubes of Super Glue. I went back out and Super Glued his every single individual door lock. I really squirted it in good--no half measures here! I glued the trunk lock. I glued his gas cap lock, and the gas cap threads as well. I glued his windows right up under the gaskets, all the way around. I glued down his windshield wipers. I unscrewed the air caps on each tire, glued the valves, then replaced the caps with a little glob of glue on the threads. I glued the hood latch. I squeezed the little bit of Super Glue remaining into the door gaskets. Then I got into my car and went home.

It was assuredly mean, evil, ill-intentioned…pick your word and I'm sure it applies. People speak of remorse and shame for such actions…but, my dear friends, I have rarely had such a satisfying experience, and I hope the joy I felt that night stays with me forever.

EDITED TO ADD: Many people have commented on woman-against-man violence, implying a double standard. Briefly: violence is to be avoided. It's wrong, ok? Doesn't matter who hit whom; it's still wrong. Domestic violence is a betrayal of trust on the most basic level. If a man had written this same post under the same circumstances, I, for one, would have given as much approval as I have received.