Ok, some Anon user asked me to answer this.

Let me compare the languages to a popular battle. I am not used to these kind of comparisons, please comment your views and I will edit the comparisons.
(1st UPDATE: Added Gollum)
(2nd UPDATE: Added Hobbit)

C is the One Ring.

The power of C is known to them all. Everyone wants to get its Power.

So C is not an army fighting in the war. It's the Ultimate Throne everyone wants. Its the King's Landing. C's power is what everyone is fighting for.

C++ is Saruman.

Everyone thinks that he is the good guy. Everyone was made to believe that he is the good side. But once you get to know him, you will realise he wants the power, not good deeds. And there is ugly side inside him!

Java is Gandalf.

He wants Peace. He works with everyone. He shares his JVM with all the other languages. He visits all platforms and talks with them. Java is C++ without evil.

Python is the Ent.

Really calm guy. Doesn't bother anyone. He helps little Hobbits understand computer concepts during their undergraduate course. And he helps Wizards during their PG course.

Ruby is the Man.

Very emotional creature. Just because they managed to come up with Ruby on Rails, they feel they are superior and need to rule Middle Earth.

PHP is the Orc

Ugly guy. Doesn't respect the rules. A big headache to a lot of people who manage them. But still dominates most of the Middle Earth.

The Orcs are teaming up with Saruman and coming up with something called HipHop.

C# is the Elf

Beautiful creature. But stays in their land, Rivendell ( Microsoft Platform ). Doesn't work well with others. Even if they work with someone, they tend to leave them after the job is over. IronPython & IronRuby was abandoned by Microsoft.

Go is Gollum

Nobody can love the power of the One Ring more than this creature. Pretty small compared to others and has this two sided personality. One side talks in C++ and the other side talks in Python. ( Google's Go: A New Programming Language That's Python Meets C++ | TechCrunch )

JavaScript is the Hobbit ( Thanks to Rob Bartlett for this suggestion)

Frequently underestimated. Evil can still corrupt them if given enough time. There are some tricksters (good and bad, though well-meaning). They are well-known for the slow, gentle life of the Shire (Browsers). But don't be surprised to find them in other places you wouldn't expect (Server-side).

APL is the Men of the Mountains a.k.a Dead Men of Dunharrow

They are nothing but ghosts now. But they can perform all sorts of deadly moves within a blink of an eye.

Don't believe me?, here is the "Conway's Game of Life" implemented in one line.

I support Ent. Suits my character :)