DENMARK-

- We speak Danish, not dutch.

- What Americans call 'danishes', we call it 'wienerbrød', which actually means 'Viennese bread'.

- We don't think of ourselves as the happiest people in the world, rather, we are the most content. There is a big difference to us. Happy is a temporary high, while content is an average mean. Very important distinction when you only see the sun a handful of times a year.

- It is very easy to get to know us slightly (very friendly), but incredible difficult to get to know us well (very private). Also, most of us have the same friends since childhood, so we don't have much time for new friends.

- Privacy is considered a basic human right here. So that means, don't talk to the person next to you on the bus, it's considered rude.

- 'Irony' is the basis of the Danish psyche. We will often make an inappropriate joke when we are feeling uncomfortable, which is often.

- Women & men are very equal here, so that has led to some confusion in the standard mating ritual. Think of two rams butting heads, but with less romance and more sex.

- We are VERY relaxed about sex, but we used to be more relaxed about nudity. Used to be, every beach was awash in nude bodies, but that has slowly disappeared. We blame American media for their portrayals of unattainably perfect bodies so that now Danish women are self-concious.

- We like to blame America for a lot of the things that ail us, but at the same time, we are very enthusiastic about embracing much of American culture.

- Marriage is a bit of an outdated concept here. Someone will talk about their girlfriend, and then you find out they mean the mother of their three children that they have lived with for 20 years.

- A huge majority of the country belongs to the Church of Denmark, but in reality we are all just a bunch of godless heathens. We don't need to pray for salvation when we have such a great welfare system.

- Most of us are not racist, just ignorant, since Denmark is such a homogenized place. Outside of Copenhagen, it is Whiteytown, capitol of Whiteyville. If you grow up with brown skin in a small town (like I did), be prepared for a LOT of ridiculous but well-meaning questions.

- Speaking of ridiculous, the men and women of Copenhagen are ridiculously good-looking. Good genetics, a love of fitness, and healthy food really go a long way.

- We are not nearly as violent as all our exported television programs portray us as. There is actually very little murder & crime here.

- If you can put up with the expense & the weather & the difficulty getting to truly know people, it is a lovely place to call home.